Wednesday, October 12, 2011

Enjoy These Free Drinks

When you get laid-off the first thing people want to do is get you drunk.
It's like saying, "You're feeling pretty awful, let's numb it for a while. That way you wake up feeling even worse. But hey, you have time -you can sleep it off now!"

I don't find that alcohol solves any of my problems I'm currently facing. It does make me eat more and sleep more-- but since I'm not applying to be a bear anytime soon, I don't think this helps me.

Even odder is, the people that brought upon my lay-off, want to buy my drinks. This is strange because drinking while moody calls for co-misery; it does not call for people to watch their work cause misery drinking. Yet, there I stood in a dark bar at 4pm yesterday getting free drinks at the expense of those who are still standing in the company.

The kicker: My co-layoffees and I looked way happier than those who have to continue working.
I'm pretty sure that had nothing to do with the free booze and everything to do with new-found freedom.

"So, where are you going next?" many former co-workers asked.

... well, seeing as this was unplanned and happened only two weeks ago --there's no really great answer here. Sure, we've all been on interviews or taking on some freelance work. But to ask that question and expect a solid answer is almost insulting.

So, I replied in a dry voice, "Oh, I'm going to go home and cry and cry."

or I replied, "Exciting things are going on at Funke Industries. It's a great work environment, easy commute, we get pizza whenever we want, and my boss is adorably funny."

or I replied with a line of vastly hyperbolic leads, "Oh, well I've got my agents looking into things, and a few book deals / show deals on the line."

Really, the answer is, I'm going to do what everyone who gets laid-off does. Try to relax, while searching for a better job and forgetting the job that forgot me.

Oh, and I'll drink your free drinks, because job or no job, free is the best price around.

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