We get ready for holidays way too far in advance these days.
Before the dancing Santa's were out of the stores there were those russian roulette boxes of chocolates on the shelves and red hearts dripping from store windows.
All of these beautiful, lovey- dovey, romantic symbols scattered about the city.
Even in places that have nothing to with love, like in banks and methadone clinics.
All of these Valentine's Day decorations seem to scream the same thing at me,
"You are going to die bitter and alone!"
It's not just me.
Every single person seems to be walking around miserable lately,
we're all whining about how we're alone,
but we whine together and somehow the alcohol and friendship makes it all OK.
But when I opened up my iTunes-
my sanctuary, my distraction from all misery and loneliness
and there's a freakin' Valentine's Day promotional box...
well this is all I could do:
I hope that the ad wizards that came up with this one get stuck in an elevator with the freakin'
Love Boat theme song playing endlessly.
This Valentine's Day I'm watching LifeTime movies -
so I can watch women in abusive relationships and be happy that it's not me.
This post is so angsty it needs black eyeliner and a gift card to Hot Topic.